Jaw Dropper

"Well, when you use disposables you only have to change the diaper four times a day."

Yes, that was a real comment from a real mom in my mom's group. 

I wasn't there, but as my friend was telling another mom about cloth, this was actually said out loud. When I heard about it, my jaw dropped. When I told my husband, his jaw dropped. First, who would do that to their child? Second, who would admit that in a group of moms?

I enjoy the playgroups Baby J and I are apart of and it's fun to interact with other adults who are like-minded. These types of comments make me wonder about these people though. 

I joined this particular group when Baby J was about six months old. Half of the people are super welcoming, the other half are very cliquish. (It's not underlined, so it appears to be a real word.) 

I try to be friendly with everyone, but this particular mom has never been super welcoming to me. In fact, she's someone that I really don't care to be around, but I try to not judge from the few times I've met her. I must say I was super annoyed when we were at a play date and her older son hit me upside the head with a toy and she didn't say anything to him. I did. I told the kid not to do that again in my teacher voice. I keep it around for occasions like this. When he kicked me as he was flipping himself on the couch, I suggested he go play somewhere else. Like closer to his mother and away from the younger babies. 

So yesterday my friend came over and was excited to tell me that a newer mom in our group was asking about cloth diapers. Of course, as the great friend she is, she chimed in and told her about Bum Luxury. Don't you love good friends?!? As they were discussing how great cloth diapers are, this other mother chimed in with the infamous quote, "Well, when you use disposables you only have to change the diaper four times a day."

Why would you have to change a diaper any less because it's not reusable? Does your child only use the restroom four times a day? Do you only use the restroom four times a day? I live in a middle class neighborhood along with the rest of the parents in my playgroup-why would you choose to keep a dirty diaper on you child? In one hand, I'm glad I wasn't there to hear her say it because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. On the other hand, I couldn't keep my mouth shut, which is exactly what everyone else did. Nobody said anything to her! Um, hello?!? I assume they were as shocked as I was when I heard this statement, but I'm surprised that no one had anything to say in response. What would you have said? I can think of a few choice words myself.

This picture is from a fellow blogger's post and she was definitely going to change the diaper.

The fact is, no matter what you choose to use to diaper your baby, they need changed just the same. If your baby goes to the bathroom, their diaper should be changed. Just because a diaper has the ability to hold in a gallon of liquid, doesn't mean it should.

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Parents in Poverty: A diapering dilemma

1 in 3 parents in America financially struggle to diaper their child. 

It's an astounding statistic and it really fires people up-especially people who cloth diaper. 

There are many disposable diaper companies that raise money and awareness to donate diapers to this cause, but it's like the saying: 

If you give a man a fish he will have a single meal.
If you teach him how to fish, he will eat all his life.-- Kuan-tzu (Chinese Philosopher)

I say this because giving one family here and there disposable diapers isn't helping them to diaper their child for 2 1/2 years, the average amount of time a child wears diapers. 

There are many debates that go along with this. Some people say if you can't afford to have a child, you shouldn't. Well, that may be true, but surprises happen. Others think the government should provide diaper programs similar to WIC or welfare, which stirs up a whole different type of controversy. Then, there are those who say if a person can't afford to use disposables, they can't afford to use cloth.

I disagree. 

There are many types of cloth diapers, the cheapest being prefolds and covers-basically what our parents and their parents used, but nicer than plastic pants-which are still available.

This chart shows a breakdown of the cost to use cloth. Basically, it costs $0.06 per diaper change to use cloth vs. $0.25 per disposable. With the average baby going through 6,000 diapers before they are potty trained, the difference is significant-$1,140. Personally, I can think of many ways to use that money!

Many people don't  have access to a washer/dryer in their home, however. The cost of doing laundry in a laundromat is expensive at $4+ per load. What should these parents do?

Growing up, I remember my mother doing laundry in the bathtub. It was something we needed and it had to get washed one way or another. There are parents that choose to cloth diaper and wash each diaper after wearing. That may not work for everyone, but it is an option. If families have to use a laundromat, I would definitely air dry my diapers to save the dryer costs. 

People then argue that parents who can't afford disposable diapers, probably don't have time to hand wash cloth ones. We are really assuming here. I know many people who choose to stay at home because they have multiple children and it wouldn't make sense financially for them to put their children in daycare-they would pay more than they would make. It's a lose-lose situation. 

I don't know what the answer is here. My point is that if a parent can't afford to use a new disposable each time they change a diaper so that they have to 'wash' it out, they might as well use cloth because it will actually become clean when they wash it.

I would love to hear other people's thoughts on this sad issue. 

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